Video Monday 19

[ausare]

Am so pissed that all I'm concentrating my effort on is to control my temper or I'll be cursing and swearing right now. There are so many angry, negative thoughts shooting through my mind that I can't begin to type coherently if I tried to blog about this current... situation. Looking back, it's hard to imagine how I used to love it and enjoy my long hours when now, even just thinking about them and seeing their status updates on Facebook is enough to boil my anger all over again even if they're not the cause of it. Then again, when I'm thinking about them, I can't help wondering if the understanding of what we share isn't mutual, that I'm the only one being too sentimental and automatically putting this on a pedestal because that's the kind of person I am, thinking too highly of friendships when the people I share it with obviously don't think the same.

Anyway. I can't blog like this—without a clear mind and a better sense of objectivity, where I might end up regretting what I shared online when I read my old entries again in the next few days or weeks.

Meanwhile, here's something cheerful.

VIDEO MONDAY 19

[Direct link to the video]

Oh, the things we don't realise until someone points it out.

—
以上、Chii です。

Comments

[ausare.livejournal.com]

Hmm. I think friends are a gift. They're the family we can choose, right? Or however that quote goes. But friendship? That bond between people who would otherwise be strangers? That takes serious commitment, and while I do feel angsty and disappointed that some of mine don't feel the same as I do about our friendship, I always hold on to the hope that as long as I take the initiative to maintain it, they'll chip in some effort on their part. Because while we're complaining that they don't make an effort, we end up not doing anything either and someone has to take that first step. Although, sometimes, even after I make an effort they don't follow up to it, so... =\

But yeah, there will always be some other friend who does respond as we hope someone would =)